My Daughter (step) invited me to spend this past weekend with her. She is going to college in Arlington, Texas, and her best friend from 8th grade was celebrating her 21st birthday. I felt very honored to be invited to partake in the festivities.
I know this is not exactly adoption related, but I feel that being a step parent in some ways parallels adoptive parents. When my (step) Daughter first moved in with my husband and I we had a very strained relationship to say the least. Amanda was 11 going on 12, and as we all know this is a very difficult age. All those hormones raging through the body.
We both struggled to get and maintain some type of relationship. I think the turn around came when she turned 16. Her and I really started talking and confiding in one another. She always called me Mrs. Kelly. Some people asked me if that bothered me and I always said no. I am also a (step) Daughter and know how these relationships can be. I did not call my stepmother Mom until I was 14 or 15. I have always said that just because you are given the title of Mom does not make it deserving to you. I felt that I would be called Mom by Amanda if I was deserving of such an honor. She started calling me Mom about 3 years ago. I know that the word Mom to her is important, and I feel so honored that she decided to call me Mom.
After the wonderful weekend with My Daughter, I feel very blessed to be given the chance to be her Mom.
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Being a stepmom I do see a lot of similarities in my own life. I have four step kids that have gone through adolescence. They've always been kind to me but there were some cold shoulders through the puberty years, but that's normal.
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